In the midst of a recent heat wave I went to pick up some drinks for the fridge just in case I wanted something a little stronger than my usual water. They had Gatorade on sale so I picked up a 6-pack of this stuff. Why this particular flavour/colour? Because it was all they had left. For good reason, as I later discovered.

In the store I didn’t even look at the label. I just figured it was blue and so probably had some kind of berry flavour. My bad. I thought it tasted like antifreeze. But then I don’t know what antifreeze tastes like because I don’t have a wife who’s trying to poison me. I had to be really thirsty just to get through one bottle.

But what was it supposed to taste like? Orange energy drinks are orange flavoured. Purple ones are grape. The red ones may be cherry but are more likely fruit punch. And this is what they’re called on the label.

This is called . . . Glacier Freeze? What does that mean? That it tastes like run-off from the Greenland ice shelf? For what it’s worth, I went online and found this AI slop:

Glacier Freeze Gatorade is widely understood and marketed as a blend of refreshing, subtly sweet citrus and berry flavors with a dominant crisp, cool taste. The exact composition remains a closely guarded secret, but the prevalent consensus points towards notes of lemon-lime combined with a hint of raspberry, creating its signature icy profile.

Unlike some Gatorade flavors that are explicitly tied to a single fruit, Glacier Freeze offers a more complex and abstract flavor experience. This ambiguity is part of its appeal, allowing consumers to project their own interpretation onto the taste. The marketing has also played a key role in shaping perceptions. The “glacier” imagery evokes a sense of icy coolness and cleanness, reinforcing the refreshing quality of the drink. The pale blue color further contributes to this association.

It’s essential to note that taste perception is subjective. Factors like individual taste buds, cultural background, and even the temperature of the drink can influence how someone perceives the flavor of Glacier Freeze. While the majority may identify lemon-lime and raspberry, others might detect subtle nuances of other berries or citrus fruits. Ultimately, the ‘true’ flavor is a personal experience, shaped by individual interpretation.

Yeah. Whatever. I guess it tastes like whatever you think it tastes like then.

Since all labels have to be printed in both English and French in this fair land, I spun the bottle around and found this.

All of which only told me (something I didn’t know) that the French word for “iceberg” is “iceberg.”

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